STATUS: FRUSTRATED

WE’RE NOT READY.
STOP ASKING.

We’re working as fast as we can, which isn't very fast because we're currently shouting at a cloud. Sign up if you want to be the first to know when we finally get our act together.

* We promise not to sell your data, but we might complain about you.

💢 3 Reasons Why This Is Taking So Long

01

The internet is too loud

Every time we try to write a single line of code, another meme distracting us pops up. It's a miracle we even finished this landing page.

02

Our cat deleted the database

His name is Pickles. He walked across the keyboard. He looked us in the eye. He knew exactly what he was doing.

03

We forgot how to code

We spent a week debating if we should use tabs or spaces, then realized we'd forgotten what a semicolon does. It was a dark time.

Stop asking Coming soon-ish We are tired Don't follow us
Stop asking Coming soon-ish We are tired Don't follow us

LIVE FEED: OUR OFFICE (NOT REALLY)

STILL HERE?

If you're looking for professional polish, you've come to the wrong neighborhood. We do things differently. Mostly, we do things slowly.

warning

Expect extreme disappointment or slight amusement.

You scrolled to the bottom?

There's nothing else here. Seriously. Go outside. Or just scroll back up and put your email in that box. It's the only thing that works.

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